If you haven’t figured it out yet: I love to write! it’s one of my biggest passions since I was a little girl along with drawing (I’ll show you some of my art later). What you don’t know about me, is that my mind doesn’t rest, at all. I’m not even exaggerating, my mind is an idea factory that does not give me a break, it’s even exhausting sometimes. I used to have hyperactivity when I was younger, I lost it with age but the sequels are still there especially when it comes to school studies and ‘boring’ classes in which I end up sleeping or not being able to focus at all. And by boring I mean things I’m not genuinely interested in, which is the main problem for hyper active kids or teens, even older people around the world.
If I could describe it in a sentence it would go this way: whenever it’s not something you want to think about, you don’t. This last sentence I said was so true in my case, that it didn’t concern only my studies but also how I perceived and ‘processed’ things in my mind. Whenever there was a problem I didn’t want to hear about, I didn’t. It’s was so easy to me not to think about a problem that I got into this apathetic mode sometimes seen as cold. And it’s both good and bad at the same time. When you over think about life, problems, events.. you’re more likely to get hurt, to feel the pain and be miserable about your condition so choosing to ignore these problems gives you a sort of protection and safety. But sometimes, thinking of problems helps solve them instead of postponing it. So being keen on ignoring problems until eventually they go away, isn’t that much of a solution anymore. That was exactly where I was few years ago.
So with lots, and lots of efforts, I managed to face things more instead of being that apathetic girl who shows no emotions whatsoever because she doesn’t care.Iit was hard but at the time I started pushing problems back instead of hiding so they don’t push me: I felt good. And I realized that I could do whatever I wanted, that I wasn’t in control of what happens in life but that I was 100% in charge of the way I deal with it. Understanding that helped me changed my life completely! That one little concept helped me improve the quality of life that I had to the best. I’m not a quitter anymore, I’m not somebody life can hit on nor a passive receiver… I’m a strong and confident moroccan fighter who doesn’t always get what she wants but who at least has the satisfaction of knowing I battle until the end. Life isn’t comfortable, sweet nor friendly. Life is harsh, life is gonna push you and kick you and try to tear you apart… But that’s the difference my friends: if you stand still doing nothing, ignoring problems, avoiding conflict, contact or getting in the battle, you simply lose. So if you hate your job: quit it, if you don’t like the way somebody’s treating you: tell him, if you don’t understand things: ask, if someone hates you with no reason: give that motherfucker a reason (just kidding, but ask him why he does you might realize you’re doing something wrong, and if you’re not that sounds like his problem , right?). All I’m saying is that problems are nothing in themselves, trying to avoid them so we can stay safe in our little bubbles is as dumb as someone not willing to eat so he can never get hungry. Life is easy, one of it’s rules is that the winner isn’t the one who solves things but the one who does something to solve them. And guess what, I decided to be a winner.
What about you?